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When you’re angry….

When you are angry it is sometimes suggested that you can let it out by screaming, kicking cans, and punching pillows.  The truth is these behaviors only make you angrier.  A healthier response would be to take a time out.  Walk away from a project that is frustrating you and get a cup of coffee.  If your dealing with a customer or a coworker make an excuse to walk away for a few minutes to compose yourself.  Send your child to their room for a time out while you calm down and think it out.

If you are fighting with someone, tell them you need to take a time out and promise them you will be back in a few minutes (10 to 30) to continue the discussion. Then leave the room, get some fresh air, or maybe do something physical like walk on your treadmill.  Return at the time you promised and continue.  Do not leave the area, talk to others about the problem, or drink alcohol.  Leaving will only make the other person angrier.  You need time to calm down and think about the problem to find solutions.   Talking to others, looking at your phone, or watching television isn’t actively working on the issue.

Through it all deep breathing will make you calmer.  Try breath counting while taking a time out.  Sit in a comfortable position with your back straight.  Close your eyes and take deep, natural breaths.  Count from one to five as you exhale.  Repeat.  Continue for one to 10 minutes.

About Geraldine M. Brown MS, LPC, LIMHP (162 Articles)
I hold a Master's Degree in counseling. I am a licensed professional counselor and a licensed independent mental health practitioner. I have over 25 years of experience counseling people from all walks of life.

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