We all have a good idea of what unconditional love is. That is when we love someone no matter what! Mothers are generally good at this. Or on the other side: when someone loves us no mater what! So what would unconditional happiness look like.
To be happy no matter what?! That seems like a far fetched idea. After all we need so many things to be happy. Conditions and situations must be just right to be happy. We need the perfect spouse, the right friends, a meaningful career, a house others approve of, and a new car. This might not match your list exactly. What is on your list “what I need to be happy?” While you’re at it take a look at why this stuff is on your list. Are you working yourself to death, giving up what you truly enjoy to have the big house on the hill? All because some 10 year old said they didn’t like your family’s house when you were a child. Just because that encounter made you unhappy at that moment, doesn’t mean the big house on the hill will make you happy in this moment. “I must have that house to be happy'” is a condition you have placed on your happiness. What if you removed that condition? The condition keeps you from being happy in the home your in today. You can throw open the doors you have now to family and friends. You will enjoy their company just as much in this house. You can take your kids to the public pool or swimming hole and their laughter will ring the same as in that pool behind the house on the hill. If you want the big house go for it, just don’t make it a condition of your happiness.
There are as many conditions of happiness as there are people. “I’ll be happy when I get a new job, leave this town, or lose weight”. Would it be awful if you were fat and happy? Humming a happy little tune while you walk the treadmill. I am sure a new job will make you happier. There is no reason to wait for that job to be happy. Remove the condition, be happy now, no matter what. Happiness is all in your psyche. It is how you think about things. It is about being thankful for what and who you have in your life. It is living with a level of contentment.
How do you remove the conditions? Give it some thought. What are the conditions you have put on your happiness? Why? Practice good self- talk. When you are telling yourself what you need to be happy simply remind yourself, you can be happy without it. You can be happy working toward it. You deserve unconditional happiness! You can be happy NO MATTER WHAT!