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The Secret Sauce

When it comes to being happy everyone is looking for the secret sauce. That stuff that adds flavor.  We all run around trying new things and new people looking for that stuff that adds flavor.  Guess what!  We find a lot of things that add flavor and happiness to our lives.  I recommend tasting new adventures.  However, these things don’t always have the same impact over time. We sometimes even talk these wonderful new things down to ourselves.  Or tell ourselves we don’t deserve them.  No matter what we have or are doing, how we talk to ourselves about it makes all the difference.

That is because the true secret sauce for happiness is self-talk.  It is important how you talk to yourself.  The self-talk going on in your head is the most powerful conversation you will ever have. Therefore it is important enough to start giving it some thought.  You will never be happy if you tell yourself you shouldn’t be or that you don’t deserve to be.  You can’t be happy telling yourself that you aren’t good enough.  Start listening to the things you say to you. Do you constantly criticize yourself?  No one can grow and be happy under that kind of pressure.  Do you call yourself names?  Would you talk to others the way you talk to you?

Change that conversation.  Tell yourself good positive things.  Point out your strengths.  See the good in what you do.  Talk to yourself like you would a friend.  If a friend failed at something you would never yell at them, calling them names.  How would it be helpful to do that to yourself?  Stop telling yourself you have to be everything to everyone.  So you can’t throw a softball, are you a ball player or an artist.  Remind yourself of what you have accomplished. I am saying you shouldn’t work on the things you wish to improve. Work on them, don’t belittle yourself because of them.  Encourage yourself.  Sooth yourself.  Be gentle and kind to yourself.  Good, positive self-talk is the secret sauce.

Get out some paper, write “I Like You Because” at the top.  Then list 100 things you like about you or that you have accomplished.  It will take you awhile if your not use to talking yourself up. Days or weeks it doesn’t matter just do it.  We all have good and bad qualities. Only allowing yourself to see the bad is not living in reality.  This can be a very good place to start changing your self talk.

Talk To Yourself Like Your Are Someone You Love!

About Geraldine M. Brown (110 Articles)
I hold a Master's Degree in counseling. I am a licensed professional counselor and a licensed independent mental health practitioner. I have over 20 years of experience counseling people from all walks of life.

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